[align=center][size=24]23rd of September[/size][/align] [i]The first time I met her…[/i] I was chosen for an outside-the-campus contest. I’m competing for newspaper writing but then I am not alone. There was a senior girl who was I’m with, and a teacher-in-charge guiding the two of us. I never have been closed to anyone especially coming from other year level and especially to a girl. She’s quiet and simple… just like every girl in campus? But she’s not. We rode in a cab. The teacher sat on the shotgun seat and the two of us at the back. There’s a wide gap between us. We both don’t talk. I don’t talk… especially to a girl and she intended to be quiet too. My eyes fixed at her while she seems to be wondering the things outside that window. Suddenly… she caught me staring at her… I’m thinking of looking away but then I was frozen when she flashed a simple and sweetest smile that I never witnessed… not until she showed me. “I’ll go now. Wish me luck.” That’s what she told me before she entered a glass-walled room. I just nodded being mesmerized by seeing her smile once again. She was competing for a drawing contest… her contest was held first and it took four hours for them to finish their works. On those four hours, I just watched her sketching and creating her art with hands shaking. I don’t know why every time she’s flipping her hair, wiping those small sweats on her forehead and leaning on her hand… I feel something beating on my chest. Something that is unusual and indefinable… But when she looked around and saw me… her shaking hands seemed to calm down and she smiled at me again. She mouthed… “Can you stay there for a while?” I don’t have the assurance if those what her lips really meant but then, I just nodded. Before her time is up, I just went back to the waiting room and prepared my stuffs for my contest. She came running with her things and sat beside me. The teacher asked her how was it and she cheerfully answered that at first, she felt very nervous… but… before continuing she glanced at me and patted my head… and added “But he was there so I feel better and I think I did just fine.” Her smile once flashed and this time I realized what this is about… I started to love her the first time I saw her. It is really a love at first sight… and her smile was the very powerful spell that she unintentionally cast to me. She became my inspiration on that day. Unlike me able to watch her, I, together with the other competitors, was stuck in a closed air-conditioned room. I tried to focus on writing but I can’t especially when all I can think is her smile… is her. Minutes have passed, others started cramming their papers and pens except me. I keep staring the ceiling, missing her face. The door opened smoothly and it was surprise to see her entered. There was confusion for her sudden appearance; she started walking towards… is it true? Towards me? But then I stopped jumping to conclusions and held my papers and pen, pretending to be writing something. I just felt someone patted my head, I looked up and it was her… melting me with a smile. She leaned down, whispering something to my right ear… I immediately went out of the contest room with excitement to see her again. She was resting on couple of chair… sleeping. It once stroked me seeing her angelic and cute face. My hand was not able to struggle and brushes her hair that woke her up… “Sorry to bother you…” I tamely apologized and looked away. She tapped my arm and said “It’s a thank you that you woke me up. How was it?” I wanted to answer that “I did great and it’s all because of you…” rather I answered “It went just fine.” The teacher we are with haven’t return yet, someone is talking with him on the corner. The two of us are the only people left quiet and I can see her blowing big sighs. She suddenly poked me on my left cheek. I looked at her and what she only did was to smile… again, it’s melting me faster than ice does. I ignored so that she can’t see me blushing for what she did. Minutes passed, it’s getting boring. I saw her swinging her legs, signed that she’s totally bored. My mind was drain; I really cannot say anything good to make this time with her be fine. I am tight-lipped just to talk to her. Until to the point that the teacher came back and we were prepared to go back at the school. We rode on a public bus. The bus was empty and we can sit on any seats we want. She chose to sit near the window while I decided to stay behind her seat. The clouds pour heavy rain in instance. The teacher asked if we brought our umbrellas, I nodded for a ‘yes’ and she shyly confessed that she doesn’t have one. Every girl brings her own umbrella right? Because their afraid to get dark skin when it is sunny days while get wet when it rains… except her. Instead of frowning, she laughed mixed with a shame. Automatically, faster than the bus is running, I intruded and said “I can share my umbrella…” with you, I muttered the last two words. She looked back at me and almost killed me… I mean she smiled “Thank you so much…” When the bus stopped on the terminal, I quickly went down and opened my umbrella, she hopped out too and stay beside me. With one umbrella, me and her… I feel hot when her skin touches mine. The teacher left us, we are going to pass a mall but I guess we’re prohibited. Suddenly she held my wrist and pulled me. “Come let’s go…” I try to keep covering her against the rainfall. “We’re not allowed, are we?” She stopped, let go of my wrist “I already told him and he said that I’ll just watch over you. Meaning… he agreed already.” Someone accidentally bumped her and fortunately, I caught her on her waist with my hand. We are like in a movie scene with rain background… me and her… my eyes fixed at hers… my hand on her waist. Our faces are like two inches away from each other… I almost kiss her… I wanted to kiss her. It took a minute before I let go of her… I took her hand and we ran to the mall. I don’t know… everything went on its own. Since we’re allowed, I just enjoy the time with her and she seems to like the day too. We went to a random games corner, a karaoke station and lot more. We even took our first pictures together. There was one picture that I forgot my limitation and placed my shoulder on her that we seemed to be a couple and she had this cute pose not minding what I have done. When the pictures went out, she just laughed seeing those. We both have the same copies since that photo booth is really for couples. The day turned to night already, we both forgot the time. We just have our dinner together and we didn’t talk for a while. I feel embarrass but happier. It seems that she is already my girl, my lady. It seems that she’s mine. I went home saying “I wish she’s really mine…” even going to bed. “I wish she’s mine…” I picked the photos we have from a while ago and I can’t resist myself staring at her. I really think that I’m in love… and… I love her. The classes went on. Months have passed. I can still remember the day I was with her having fun. The first time I saw her and my heart being captivated by her smile and start to love her this much. We always meet along the hall, sometimes on my or her room. There’s no day that we will not see each other around campus. Every day, she greets me with a smile, saying “hello” and waves her hand or sometimes she mouthed “how are you?” but all I can reply is a simple “hi!” or “fine” or just a nod. On those days, I tried to avoid her but I cannot resist my eyes to look for her. I miss her… I miss her badly and crazy… I’m crazy in love with her… One day, I decided to confess to her how much I wanted her but I end up saying “I’m sorry if I’m a bit snob these past months…” She always smiled at me and said “I understand. I don’t find it snob. I just know how busy my best friend is.” Best friend… it kills me to hear that. I wanted more than that… but I cannot even say it to her directly. Until, the graduation came. She is leaving the campus and I can’t see her like every day and I’m still stupid keeping my feelings for her. Before the day of her graduation, I received a letter from her. It says… [i]Dear TaM-TaM, I hate leaving my best friend who is you. I remember the day… the day we first met and the day we stroll in the mall. Actually, I didn’t tell him that we’re going to the mall. I’m sorry that I lied. I just want to be with you that day because I so love being with you and I really enjoy that day. Do you still have our photos? I still have mine and it’s really cute. Tomorrow will be my last day in that campus and I will really miss that place, and so the people and friends and so you. I will say especially you… it’s sad but it’s life. I might leave you but I will never forget you. The day that we met and have each other together is the most memorable and happiest moment I have while I’m leaving. I hope to see you tomorrow. I hope you can come. I’ll be waiting for you at the fifth floor. I will tell you something important. Love, Tracey [/i] Even on the letter she keeps calling me Tam-Tam… I really want to see her even for the last time… tomorrow… but it feels like that I cannot because I’m afraid that she will just feel sorry and that she just want me to be her best friend. When the day came… I don’t know. My feet brought me to the place she wanted us to meet. I’m so happy to see her from far and so I continue walking… but the smile drawn to my face turned to hesitant when I saw her with a guy. The guy hugged her… I don’t know… is that what she wants to tell me? I bet it is. It hurts to see them… it will hurt more if I will hear it from her… I changed my way and ran away. I love her very much but she loves someone else. It’s feel hell! I should have told her on the earlier. Now, I’m hurt… I threw myself on my bed and I just realize that tears pour. What am I now? A gay? Hell! It hurts! It’s bleeding inside. So she really meant me only her best friend, I am a special someone for her and she only meant for a best friend. It hurts more! Knowing that I expect much. I should not feel it on the first place! My heart was so broken to pieces. I was scattered and no one can fixed me aside her love… only her can heal me. Why you cannot love me? Three days after that day that I saw her with someone else. I received a call at 8:36 in the evening… I answered “Hello…” with the heartbreak tone. “Is this Tam-Tam? I saw your name on her phone…” a girl keeps yelling on the other line “Hello? Answer me!! Is this Tam-Tam? Tracey is looking for you… please…” upon hearing her name, I stood up and ran out. [i]“Tracey is looking for you… please… Please hurry and come here at the hospital. She’s been looking for you for days… please hurry!!”[/i] All I want is to reach that place and to see her. I looked for her room and… She was laying on the bed with her weak body… everyone tries to talk to me… but I cannot hear anything aside from her calling my name. The name she always calls me from the day we met. “Tam-Tam… Tam-Tam…” I kneeled beside her and hold her hand tight… “I’m right here. I’m here already…” She opened her eyes “It’s you… It’s really you…” she said with her weak voice “It’s really you Tam-Tam…” “I’m just here… Please don’t say anything anymore. I’ll just be here…” I tighten my grip and she squeezed back. “Come… come near…” I did what she asked. “Near…” it’s like two inches away from her face. “It’s you Tam-Tam… I… I… I love you…” a tear fall from her eye. I’ve always wanted to hear those words from her. She repeated “I love you so much, Tam-Tam…” and she flashed her sweetest smile. The smile that captivates me on our first met. The smile that tells how much I want her, the smile that causes me to miss her badly and the smile that shouts how much I love her… I didn’t stop myself but to kiss her on her lips… I just want to stay just like this… kissing her like forever. And she kissed back… As I pulled away “I miss you badly, I want you like crazy and I always love you… like forever. I love you Tracey…” Her angelic and weak face drew another smile “I forever love you... Macky…” After hearing those words… At exactly 9:23… she’s gone… Just like the day I first met her. [b][i]23rd of September[/i][/b]… and she’s gone… Someone tapped my shoulder “You’re Macky… I know that. She wants to give this to you… she’s supposed to give this to you on the graduation day… but… you should read it on your own.” He was the guy that I saw with her that time. I keep staring on the notebook and finally, decided to open it… On the very first page, it was written there… [i]“I Love You… I love you Macky forever…” [/i] I flipped the pages… All that was written is about me… the day we first met, the day she fall in love for the first time… to me... Another page contains “He caught me on my waist… I fall for him… we’re like two inches away from each faces and I suddenly think him to kiss me…” [i]“I caught him staring at me… I entered his contest room just to say good luck to him. I even pretended that I left something just to give him my lucky charm pen. I told him that it gives luck but the truth is I will only give that pen to the one I love…”[/i] I remember what she whispered me that time… [i]“Use my pen… it’s yours already. It gives lo... luck…”[/i] There was our photo pasted on the next page [i]“I so love this photo… I was giggling and feel like blushing but I’m lucky he didn’t notice. I always wanted him to wrap his shoulder around me. I wish he’s my guy, my man. I wish he’s mine.”[/i] I keep reading and it hurts every time I read her messages… all those days… she loves me… she’s really loving me back… those days she always greeted me. [i]“I always want to see him that’s why I keep passing by on their hall, walking anywhere he is just to see him even in a while. I keep greeting him, hoping that he’ll talk to me longer than just greeting. I told him that he’s my best friend but I really want to tell him that he’s my one and only that I love.”[/i] Another familiar thing was captured into a photo, her letter for me before her graduation… but some words are strikethrough… and it will show… [i]Dear Tracy ♥ Macky, I hate leaving MY ONE AND ONE LOVE who is you. I remember the day… the day we first met and the day we stroll in the mall. Actually, I didn’t tell him that we’re going to the mall. I’m sorry that I lied. I just want to be with you that day because I so love being with you and I really enjoy that day. Do you still have our photos? I still have mine and I REALLY LOVE IT. Tomorrow will be my last day in that campus and I will really miss that place, and so the people and friends and I MISS YOU AND I LOVE YOU. I will say ESPECIALLY MY ONE AND ONLY YOU… it’s sad but it’s life. I might leave you but I will never forget AND FOREVER LOVE you. The day that we met and have each other together is the most memorable and happiest moment I have while I’m leaving. I hope to see you tomorrow. I hope you can come. I’ll be waiting for you at the fifth floor. I will tell you something important. I Love YOU FOREVER, Tracey LOVES YOU FOREVER[/i] “Why you didn’t come on her graduation?” the guy asked. I hesitate to answer “I was there… but I saw you and her…” “She’s my sister that I never seen for five years…” it hurts more and more and kills me… it’s my entire fault! “She’s about to confess what she’s feels towards you… she’s been waiting for that time… she’s sick… she has a heart cancer. She always attended her medication since the day you two met, before she already chose to accept it and just wait for her day. The doctor told her before that she only had six month remaining, but when she starts to love you. She started fighting for her life, for a longer life to be with you… I’m so sorry. You become her life. She loves you like forever she used to tell me on the day we met, on her graduation day. She loves to live longer because she wants to love you more than forever.” He left me after saying those words. Tears pours down from eyes… it’s me that didn’t trust her… I am too late… [i][b]I should have tell her how much I miss her and how much I want to be always with her, at her side, to tell how much I want to hug her tightly and kiss her lips if she lets me to. I want to tell her every day how much she meant to me and how much I love her…[/b][/i] [b]The End[/b] [b]23rd of September written by [i]mrwhize[/i] Copyright © 2012 mrwhize. All Rights Reserved.[/b] No part of this story either text or photo may be reproduced, copied, modified, or by any means, without indicated permission in writing from the author.

Last edited by mister.whize (2012-05-17 03:34:34)